Breakups Suck. It is painful and depressing. You can really feel that your heart is bleeding inside. Unfortunately, almost everyone will go through it at some point in time as not all relationships work out in the end. So, how do we cope with a breakup? Before I go into the details on how to survive a breakup. Let us first take a look at the different stages of breakups.
Once you have fully understood the different stages of breakups, you will be better prepared to deal with the emotional stress post-breakup. The following are some of the tips to help you deal with breakups and get over this dark period of time in your life.
- Talk It Out With Close Friends/Family Member
You should never go through a breakup alone. It is always good to talk it out with close friends or family members who will be more than willing to lend a listening ear or lend a crying shoulder.
Keeping it all to yourself is not healthy. You need to get it out of your system. The more you talk about it, the sooner you will find it easy to come to terms with the fact that the relationship is over.
- Hit The Gym And Start Exercising
A good Cardio workout every day can help your body release endorphins. This in turn will help you lower your emotional stress from your breakup.
Exercising also helps you stay fit and shed some excessive weight and make you feel good about yourself.
- Think About The Wonderful Things Around You
I understand that you will feel lost and abandoned and alone. You might feel that the future seems so bleak and meaningless. All the plans that you two have made together are gone now and you feel that you won’t be able to love again.
Remember, breakups don’t mean the end of world. There are other great things in your life that you are just temporarily too blinded to see. Think about all the wonderful things around you.
- Do Things That You Enjoy
You can also use this period of time to do things that you enjoy doing. It might be watching comedy or singing or playing an music instrument or drawing or playing a sports.
Do activities that will bring a smile to your face. It helps break the negative emotional pattern you might easily find yourself fall into.
- Stop Contact
In order for you to get over the breakup and move on fast, the first thing you need to do is cut off contact with your ex.
The reason is very obvious. If you still keep in contact with your ex, you will be reminded of your ex constantly. It will be difficult to clear your mind and get accustomed to the fact that you are now single and your ex is no longer a part of your life.
By cutting off contact for at least 1 to 3 months, it helps you grieve and heal and restore your life to normal.
- Get Yourself Involved In Volunteer work /Charity Work
You can also do some volunteer work or charity work in your free time. Not only it will help distract you from obsessing over the breakup, but it will also give you a sense of empowerment by giving back to the community. You will feel more positive about yourself.
- Never Go Running Back To Your Ex Because You Feel Lonely
You will feel lonely and sad post breakup, and you will be tempted to call your back up or text them in hopes of getting back together.
That is a big NO NO. you will most likely find yourself regretting the decision very soon and possibly put yourself through another breakup.
- No Idealizing Your Ex
When your girlfriend or boyfriend broke up with you, you have the tendency to overlook his/her flaws and idealize your ex.
Remember that they are just like you and me. They are normal human beings and they are not perfect. You need to realize that in order for you to get over it and move on.
- Stop Hating Your Ex
You need to get rid of the resentment you are harboring towards your ex. Maybe your ex cheated on you. Maybe your ex hurt you. It is all in the past. Learn to let go and forgive. Be the bigger person.
The most pathetic people are the people who always live in the past. Remember, you only have a limited time on earth. Are you planning to spend every waking minute of your life hating your ex and stop LIVING YOUR LIFE?
- Never Allow Yourself To Feel Worthless
If you are reading this, most likely that you are on the receiving end of the breakup. Let me tell you that you are amazing.
Just because your ex is too blind to see it, it doesn’t mean that you are not. Never never allow yourself to feel worthless. Your self-worth is defined by yourself, not by anyone else. Remember, you are who you think you are.
- Just Give it time
Time will heal all the wounds. Believe me, it is true. With time, it will hurt less and it will get better:)
Post -Breakup Dos & Don’ts
- You need to wait for at least a couple of months before you start befriending your ex again.
- There is no need to talk to or keep in touch with your ex’s friends as they will obviously be taking your ex’s side.
- Block or unfollow them on Facebook and Twitter, so that you won’t be seeing any updates from your ex post split as that will only distract you from moving on.
- Don’t talk bad about your ex after breakup. That is not nice even if they actually did something wrong. After all, he/she was someone you once fell deeply in love with. Put the past behind you.
- Don’t sleep with your ex’s friends for revenge. It just shows that you are immature and slutty. It will also reconfirms your ex’s decision to end the relationship.
- Don’t tell your ex any indiscretions that you had before the breakup. I know you might just want to anger your ex and seek revenge. But it might just make your ex feel that he/she was right to break up with you. Also it will kill any chances you have of you getting back together in case you want to in the future.
- Don’t hook up with your ex post breakup. It might be tempted to do it, but it will only complicate things and make you feel more confused.
I hope that with the help of the tips and advice to cope with break up above, you will be able to get through this difficult period of your life more easily. Breakups are not the end of world. With time, you will get over your breakup and move on.