I know what you are thinking. You are afraid that if you end contact with your ex, your ex might forget about you and move on to a new relationship. Also you must be thinking that how I am going to get back with my ex if I stop all contact with him/her. But, do you really think it’s a healthy choice for you?
You have to find out first whether or not you love your ex or you are just addicted to them before you get back together, because it is pointless in getting back with your ex if you are just too used to be with them and just hate being alone.
You need to dig deeper inside you and understand if it is worth salvaging this relationship. The no contact period gives you some time to do some thinking about your relationship.
So, do you think you are getting your ex back for the right reasons, not the wrong ones? Below is a checklist for you:
Ask yourself this question. Whenever you were together with your ex, did you feel great about yourself or did you feel insecure about yourself? If your ex made you feel happy and confident about yourself, then it means he/she might be worth getting back. The opposite is true.
Do you hate waking up alone in the morning? Do you just dread being alone? Seeing other happy couples just make you want your ex back more? If so, it is possible that you are just addicted to being in a relationship.
- Is it true that all you can think about is your ex? Are you completely ignoring your career, your health and your sleep? Do you just want to crawl up in bed and drown yourself in self-pity? If yes, it’s acutally a normal reaction to a breakup. You feel like your life is in chaos and the only thing that will bring you back to your normal life is your ex. In reality, your ex is the reason that you are in this chaos.
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Anyone who is going through a breakup is not in a stable mental state. This no contact period allows you to clear your mind and get yourself back on your feet and restore confidence.
It is true that the person, who just got dumped by the love of their life, usually becomes desperate, needy and miserable. There is nothing wrong with it. It’s natural for everyone to act this way.
As I explained in the guide on how to get your ex back, it is extremely unattractive when your ex sees a needy and desperate you. So, you should never show your ex the needy, insecure, desperate side of you, it is very likely that they will be even more repulsed.
I know it is easier said than done. If you feel desperate and miserable inside, you will show it on the outside. If you make use of this no contact period to work on yourself and become a confident and happy person, you will actually become a lot more confident and secure about yourself. This will help tremendously when you try to get your ex back.
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Whether you broke up with your ex or your ex broke up with you, your ex is the one who has all the power in the post breakup relationship. You are the one who would do anything to get back with them.
If you tried to call, text, beg, plead, or anything, then your ex is in control of this post breakup relationship. However, by just stopping contact with them, you instantly regain control. When you stop calling or texting your ex, they then start to wonder why. The longer you stay away from them, the more they start thinking about you.
More often than not, your ex might be just as miserable after the breakup. But your needy and desperate actions make them feel like they control this relationship. They feel like they can have you whenever they want.
Even though they might be hurting from the breakup, the fact that you desperately want to get back with them gives them a big ego boost. It is therefore easier for them to deal with the breakup.
If you take away that ego boost from them, then you are leveling the playing field. If you stop contacting your ex, chances are they will contact you soon. When they call you, you don’t answer their call. It will not only break their ego, but also make them realize how miserable they are without you.
If you really are serious about getting your ex back, then you need to follow exactly the advice above as it will significantly improve your chances of getting back together with your ex.